There’s no secret about the fact that arguments suck.
Nobody likes to fight—especially with their significant other and/or romantic partner.
However, the simple truth of the matter is that arguments and conflicts are going to happen, whether we like it or not.
Humans have different perceptions and viewpoints of things. And there’s just no getting around the fact that at some point, these differences are going to clash—resulting in some kind of conflict.
So, rather than avoiding the problem, the best bet is to engage in healthy conflict resolution.
Resolving relationship conflicts in a healthy way is an absolutely crucial way to maintain optimal health and wellness over time—as the state and quality of your romantic relationship will absolutely have a massive impact on your quality of life.
Here are 4 tips to help you get started.
1. Remember That This Person Isn’t Your Enemy
It can be so easy to slide into frustration and anger when a conflict or disagreement arises with your partner.
But it’s also crucial to keep in mind that this person is your loved one, not your enemy.
Try to slow things down, and remember that this conflict is just a natural result of the two of you seeing things differently.
This doesn’t put you at odds with one-another. It’s just two people who love each other trying to figure out the best way to proceed forward.
2. Try To Understand Where They Are Coming From
It’s a huge red flag when the person you love doesn’t even try to understand you or listen to your point of view.
So naturally, you don’t want to create this red flag for yourself.
Make an effort to really listen and to try to understand how they feel about the conflict.
Once you actually understand it, try to state it back to them and make sure that you have it right.
Understanding the full picture of how they feel can really help you to make progress in the conflict and take both of you closer to the point of agreement.
3. Always Be Respectful
Avoid name-calling and/or saying hurtful things.
Remember—this is your partner.
You’re supposed to love them and respect them.
By the same token, make sure that you don’t tolerate disrespect.
We deserve to be in relationships where we are respected, and where we know that even if we disagree, we will still maintain respect for one-another.
It’s highly immature to resort to name-calling, passive aggression, general rudeness, etc.
4. Don’t Ever Threaten Them
Sometimes, people get so upset that they’ll say things like:
“Wow. Maybe I should just leave.”
But here’s the thing.
When trying to navigate conflict in relationships, either you want to stay, or you don’t want to stay.
And that choice should always be yours to make… not something to hang over someone else’s head.
It’s highly unfair to ‘threaten to leave’ if the other person doesn’t ‘shape up.’
If they don’t meet your standards, or if their behavior is unacceptable—just walk away.
If not—then work together to solve the problem and find a solution.
It’s that simple.
There you have it.
4 tips for resolving conflict with a partner.
All that’s left now is to put them into practice.
You’ve got this.
Now get out there and make it happen.